matt's Journal

1:23am: who knows
i downloaded this song a couple days ago because its a good song...now i guess it has some meaning...(???)

won't you beg me and then tell me how to love you
like anybody else would
I know you're risking failure (risking failure)
go run for cover (for how long)
you better start to love her so much you're moving on and on
evans blue-beg

cant wait for japan....i just hope ill be in the right mindset to grasp everything i want to learn
heres my contact info (I'll be sending this out via facebook too)
email:japanesemattyd@yahoo.com
photos: http://new.photos.yahoo.com/japanesemattyd
LJ:matt_in_japan
skype:spartygreen

9:12pm: debauchery in the d (and surrounding areas)
phew
what a past couple of days

i got my wisdom teeth out....got better in about a week


friday:
got fitted for some new glasses
theyre kinda gum time....but not really
youll see them when I wear them

washed the car (i wait til 2 weeks before i leave for Japan to finally do it)
got chinese with dad
drove out to farmington to meet the guys
dunleavys (good convo with kirk about history, wars, andf hockey) then tequila rain
it was a good time...despite the night beginning by finding out this hot girl was 21 and married
but i guess TR has a hot streak (ask dan) because i met a real southern belle named jessica (along with her really drunk friend crystal who was totally gone)
shes from alabama and went to auburn....so i kinda have to pseudo-hate her because i pledge my allegiance to the big 10....but thats a minor detail
friday could not be easily topped

then saturday happened

we met coz's friends in GP to go to the tigers game
they get trashed off the $8 beers as we watch the tigers put up a 6 spot before jonesey made a game of it and closed out an 8-7 win by popping rolen up with the bases loaded in the 9th

coz's buddies meet a couple very attractive older women (i think you know the acronym im thikning of here)
so we chase around the hoedown and various hole in the wall bars in detroit (because thats what everyone does at 1 AM on Sunday mornings) before ending at the town pump...where our buddies apparently got their numbers...hooray

the highlight was coz's friend johnny (not nemes) noticing a chick walking by us and saying "hey coz, theres your next ex wife"
she shot us this death glare that nearly blinded me
it was lethal and of a magnitude that i had mever seen before....and ive been given death glares
unbelievable
then we crashed at his place

then sunday happened

since we were already in GP....we met my mom and gary at star for 12:30 mass
i got to see my old pastor fr. ken...who left st. a's about 5 years ago to basically run star's church and school
as we were talking...coz cooly asked for a blessing from dr. ken...which kinda caught me off guard because i had never asked for one or been there when someone else asked for one
but it was a good idea.....another one of coz's random tidbits...(put to good use of course..especially since I'll be travelling this summer)
then we went to the pancake house in GP
before he went in...coz saw a need to put air into his tires
which apparently couldnt wait until after we ate (???)
so that was random

then we went to the mall because my mom is getting my a webcam to keep in touch with her while im in japan
the computer store was across the street...so coz and i went to the mall since he needed to get shoes
then we went to aero (who i am convinced is going out of business...because they always have 50% off all their stuff) and i bought (impulsively) this really sweet shirt that has a rising sun over a beach setting on the front....definetely got me psyched up more for japan

then..to top it all off....we went to the puddle of mudd/breaking benjamin/3DG show at freedom hill...which ended up being the tamest activity of the weekend

it was a good show...i wish breaking benjamin would have headlined because i like them the most...but it was a good show all around
and coz and i got to act belligerant in a public setting one more time
saying all our quotes...talking about women....relating the songs to women....you know


9 days

i think its a good sign when i get to speak japanese with someone from singapore......as i did today
HA

7:49am: i mean....come on......
heres the situation (as my calc 3 prof would say):

Im driving the buzzed versions of dan and johnny back to their houses
im trying to make sense of 5 different sets of directions (and johnny insisting that dan met some chick named lucy) coming from the back seat and to the right of me....make a left turn down a street that is closed to through traffic....get pulled over

cop smells booze...takes our 3 DL's and the registration and insurance because i was "swerving" trying to follow my GPS system
so guess who gets to take a sobriety test
the only person out of our group of friends who doesnt drink and turned 21 before anyone else
you cant write that
you cant script things this well
so i do the ABCs, count backwards from 100-87, balancing on one foot and walking a straight line thing while i was shaking like a captured sea lion pup
and then of course...the breathalyzer
which turned out to be 0.00
the cop lets me off with a warning

come on
you cant script this
i apparently made it through quite the ordeal according to dan
i really didn't care...i just wanted to make sure i didnt make any stupid mistakes

im going to milk this for all its worth
im now officially a good guy with a bad streak
;)

9:07pm: i hope when youre in bed with her.....you think of me
kelly clarkson really hates guys
or she has a really vivid imagination
she and carrie underwood could team up to form a business where they smash up guys cars if they cheat on their women
carkel car killers inc.

but her "never again" video proves one thing:
only assholes drive mustangs

ok anyway

i brought up an issue i shouldnt have today
like....::insert witty metaphor here::
im kinda fried from checkout
but i shouldnt have said it
i need to be more conservative in my truth-seeking endeavors
ignorance can be bliss

this semester, i was overwhelmed for the first time
last semester i didnt care, this semester i got crushed
i guess thats a well rounded education (???)

3:15am: spit it baby
giggity giggity
dan and i are turning into some of the ELs most socially apt citizens
we hit up PTs, ricks, then amanda's house for the wings game (where i played guitar hero for the first time with a couple stoners....we were actually pretty good)...then ricks again (free cuz we had the hand marks) for the HAPPY ending to the wings game

and dan spitting game
i know things are going to get interesting when dan says "watch this" and starts walking towards a group of girls
hes classy
really
he tells the stories better than me..ask him if you want to know

oh and can you say free pop...hell yeah
it gives you all the power and allure of holding a drink...without the having to give up your keys or throwing up
i love it

we saw kyle cook in line for ricks (drafted by minnestoa....happy for drew)
and mojo...who is dating this girl alicia who i went to high school with....and actually remembered who i was
yeahhhh AP english

and i introduced dan to suz's gorgeous cousin natalie
that gave dan a reason to call suz and tell her how hot she was

what can i say...ike ladies are hot


and i finished my junior year of college today

mayyyyyyy 31st
:)

9:08pm: chilling in random houses on gunson and ann=fun (and other observations)
these past couple days have been some of the most memorable out of 3 years of collegiate experience....

the thursday night/friday morning shitshow...
i met the A2 gang at ricks after i got off work...dan was talking to some disproportionately hot girl (jk man...ur my bro u know that)while we were in line...went into ricks....did the usual parousing around....kirk, johnny, and dan left to go to dan's friends' at capitol villa..leaving me melissa and kelly at ricks
of course kelly finds a guy...promptly wraps him around her finger(she spits mad game...i mean crazy mad game)...and we go to his buddies house for some reason...then to his house (gunson and ann)
kelly calls down from upstairs to melissa and i while were waiting..."are u guys ok with just the TV?"
yeah you know what was going on there
::interlude::
time to pick up the drunk and high boys at CV around 4 am
order pizza house first (dominoes was closed...bastards)
dan couldnt believe we found him after we drove around the corner
6 people into the cobalt
pick up pizza house
yes dan...kelly is paying for it with her debit card (repeat)
dropped everyone off at dan's

friday:lunch with dan and johnny and work

saturday
volunteering at physics lab for sci o...which amounted to me walking back and forth in a lab room making sure the kiddos didnt use any reference materials or programmable calculators
good resume builder...and fun actually...since i grew up with sci o

then i discovered something....so wonderful
its called total sports immersion, or TSI
its where you go somewhere with more than 1 TV on a day where theres the NFL draft, hockey, baseball, and basketball on all at once
and you sit down, eat food and watch
dan and i did it to the tune of over 6 hours
6 hours
of sports
!!!!
i learned these things from my TSI experience:
1. never eat wings on an empty stomach(esp somewhere without TVs in the bathroom)
2. dan and beer is like izzo and basketball...they just go together
3. brady quinn will be throwing alot to braylon edawards (irony!)
3a. the special "suite" that quinn retreated too after 10 teams realized his arm is about as strong as a child rapist's level of morality was actually a place for him and his gf to "relax" wink wink
4. drew stanton will lead the lions to the promised land....a .500 record

drew stanton
is a lion

heres the scene
dan and i had moved to the bar area of B dubs...since the draft and audio were on the big screen and main speakers (respectively)
::the pick is announced::
about 7 other people start cheering
i high 5 dan and start giggling and jumping around
this semi-toasted grin comes over dans face as he puts his head on the table and rasies it
me:whats wrong dan? this is awesome
dan: yeah it is...but hes screwed...i cant believe this
::he puts his head on the table again and brings it back up::
we kinda repeated this process...adding in a couple phone calls...for a couple minutes
just trying to soak it in

oh and the pistons clinched their series against the magic in GAME 4 (dan didnt think it was the 4th game, despite me explaining to him how the NBA playoffs work about 8 times over the span of a couple hours)
the wings FINALLY solved the sharks with a win that was about as pretty as adam morrison on a bad day
the tigers got rocked and leyland and ledezma got tossed for something i still dont know about because i was watching the draft when it happened

then i made a monumental statement
"hey dan, lets get some chicks tonight"
i was a little taken aback by it myself right after i had said it...because i have never said it in my life
he obliged

we decided on landshark...which was very dead for the first half hour we got there
things started picked up around 11 or so
dan had a couple more...brining his grand total for the night to 210 ounces(i think?)
nothing transpired with the hot masters student who thought i was 22 and her friend..but it was a nice little episode
but we saw pete clifford and mike gyetvai..another name i had to explain to dan

then btb....but part owner wasnt there
the end to any fine evening

victory for MSU

12:44am: THE REAL WORLD.....RENNSELAER
dan and i visiting coz this past weekend was very memorable
heres a rundown:

trying to figure out how to enter the one mcdonalds in town without getting t boned by someone in drive thru
the cheap DVDs at walmart
going to some pretty hoppin parties for a school of a little over 1000
and the ladies...damn
i looked but did not touch
coz does not disappoint

and of course....the quotable coz:
his directions began with "get on a freeway..."
(referring to dan) "dude dude dance with that chick so he'll(coz's roommate) get jealous"
THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR STEALING A PIMPS HAT
THIS CARPET LOOKS RETARDED

it was a really great time
coz even gave up his bed...saying that he wanted to try out his new sleeping bag
what a stand up guy
and he basically paid for all our food too

i dont think im going to go to a frat or house party again
i never do anything there...i just sit around and listen to music
and if anyone asks...of course i say im having a good time...which isnt totally false...since i do enjoy the music...but if i said "no im not having a good time"..what the hell would happen?
especially at coz's where the nearest movie theatre or anything else of interest for that matter was 45 minutes away
but in general...saying id rather be playing playstation or watching a game wouldnt accomplish much
so i think im just going to avoid parties altogether
that goes for clubs too

another quote from coz over the weekend...about why i wont make it in the CIA
"dude...youre not gonna make a good CIA agent...youre gonna be spying on some arabs (since im minoring in japanese)....and they'll be like ALALALALALAALALALALA and youd start giggling...then theyd jump out of their hole and go SHOOT HIM and theyd kill you
(it took me about 5 minutes to stop laughing from that one)

but au contrare my bespectacled friend....
i am very good at hiding emotions
a conversation i had with molly on NYE:
molly: wow...i didnt know your grandma died in september
me: mission accomplished

see...i can keep a secret
and i do lie to get out of things
or try to get out if them for that matter
its generally worked in the past....but when its backfired...baaad things have happened
like....fallout from the bomb bad things

but...bottom line...i can lie and i can hide my feelings
i can be totally open and share vulgar jokes with ppl i dont know (which i did)...or slip into the background and become an observer like i did too
its some sort of schizophrenia
i also can use ppl and then forget they exist
sounds like CIA material to me


i hide my feelings because i feel i have to deal with them myself
if i spill my guts to ppl....they still cant take my place
take when my grandma died in the middle of first semester
yes it was great to be able to cry and have britt give me a hug...but i still had to face 18 hours of being in a funeral home the next 2 days and seeing my uncle and dad cry for the first time together ever
when my dad cries...i immediately feel totally vulnerable and unprotected...because he has been the strongest individual in my life
and i had to deal with it
as im writing this...it feels like im prying open a door thats been rusted shut
because like i said...im a private person
some people only see the outgoing side of me...esp coz...since i just act that way around him..but im mainly private

so thats who i am

5:22pm: im 21 matt....so i can do this shit....*
i had my first encounter of the year with drunk armstrong chicks last night
well....they didnt really live in armstrong...but they were visiting this guy who lives 2 doors down from me
this girl who i had seen earlier in the guys' bathroom because her friend had to puke (i think???) knocked on my door and informed me that her friend was really drunk and really lonely....and she wanted a hot guy to make out with
yeah im a hot guy....but i didnt feel like making out with anyone...much less a drunk chick
so i politely declined....then it turned out that this chick has family who went to CV and live in clinton twp (aka my old hood)
small small world

i took care of some business today and bought a stanton jersey
hello heisman

*andrew thomas costello is the funniest drunk person on this planet

i had to ask my japanese prof something after class today...and she made me ask it in japanese
that was hot
even hotter...i actually knew what to say
and then i ran into the prof i had last year
and spoke japanese some more
yessssss

1:12pm: alright alright slowww down
what better way to get reacclamated than to work 25 hours in 2 days on 7 hours of sleep
!!!!!111
well i didnt have to do as much bitchwork as i did last year....i got to supervise everything
at least it wasnt raining and hot and sticky like it was the past 2 welcome weeks
so we got 400 ppl moved in in around 8 hours
and if you know how cramped brody is....you know thats very efficient

florida was big pimpin
as you would expect
my aunt and unlce live in this gated community on a golf course (of course) that is about half filled with million dollar homes
theirs was about 600k....because it only has 1 very nice guest bedroom (in addition to everything else)
roughing it i know...but it was very comfortable
and they live 5 minutes from the twins' spring training facility

quote of the vacation....by moi....."i hope brady quinn gets hit by a car"
we know where my mind is
;)

something erks me about tropicana field (the trop)
baseball should always be played in a stadium that is outdoors or can be converted to an outdoor setting
why do you think we dont have the expos anymore?
and i think the blue jays should be moved to portland (5 teams in the AL west)
then give buffalo a professional baseball team to even things out (they already have the buffalo bisons....AAA affiliate of the indians)
the lily and hillenbrand things are funny.....and its a comical reason to obliterate the idea of a professional baseball franchise in canada
3 strikes and youre out eh

could someone please tell me why i have an 8 AM class twice a week spring semester?
oh im crazy
yeah thats right
giggity

i really wanna go to the chingy concert on friday night
its gonna be off the chizank

12:42am: sexy
hooook...so...
here is the earth...chillin....

that crazy SOB sutika called me today
and we hung out
twas good times as usual
he showed me his sweet ass suite
he put his desk up on this half loft thing him and nick built
and they have 2 TVs
i mean come on
thats rediculous

so we went to meijer for school supplies then b dubs
crazy thing happened
so we sat down
and our smoking hot waitress comes over
first thing she asks us
"can i get you guys a beer?"

yes thats right
i got hit on by a girl i didnt know for the first time EVEEERRRRR
by her thinking i was 21
im a little over 3 months away...but im not 21 yet
ok so ill consider it getting half hit on
but its the first time ive been offered alcohol by a chick
so...let me have my 15 seconds here
thanks

oh yeah...then this girl whos working for us this year was there and she recognized me
so it was melissa and matt and matt for a brief while
yeah being a sup rocks

and my RA's name is matt
he made us all bob ross nametags for our doors
how pimp is that

and one of my neighbors is named matt

sexy name indeed

i only got to watch the last 10 minutes of laguna tonight due to the tigers...but the 10 minutes i caught were full of hot chicks
go MTV

8:44pm: armstrong bitchesssssssss
im no longer a residenbt of rather hall
::tear::
she sure was a fine ship

but i cant wait to find out what surprises armstrong will hold

i think they should rename the miami/FSU matchup the thug bowl
a game that will decide the ACC for about 17 out of the next 20 years....and theyre not going to change the biggest college football game in the state of florida (let alone the ACC) to the end of the season any time soon....does this mean that women from florida dont climax either?

but think of what that prefield meeting would be
::coker and bowden stare each other down as the seminole whoops the corwd up and throws the flaming spear....or the ibis goes on the field and does his little dance depending on what year it is::
ROLEPLAY TIME
"i suspended more players this summer for violation of undisclosed team rules....bitch"
"i have 1 son coaching in this conference and another on ABC....bitch"
"my golf hats cooler than your hat....and i dont look like hannibal lector"
::2 old men grappling::
and while this is happenening....the players are playin the feud even before the game begins..throwing fisticuffs and helmets etc etc

possibilities ppl...possibilities
maybe im just a visionary

junior seau retired....so i guess we'll be having fried chicken and watermelon in the HOF now (if he makes it....13 pro bowls should do it)

robertson is pwning big papi
get out the big league chew

6:21pm: of all the fish in the sea.....PROM WITH ME???!!!1111
laguna beach marathon
all day today
every episode
giggity

and during the commercials...theyre showing these little teasers for season 3...oh man i cant wait
such a teen dramedy whore

for the first time ever...i actually want summer to end
i want to get back into classes...work...football (duh)....and generally having people on campus

i have the keys to my new room....hopefully i'll be all moved into it tomorrow...since my dad is coming up

i love meijer
i got 2 cases of water (48 bottles)
3 boxes of cheez its
and a box of fruit loops for $12
my rations are set for the rest of the summer

the lions are on pace to go undefeated...if last night was any indication
/jinx

6:29pm: ::mexican hat dance music::
oh what a delightful evening in d born
coz and i were actually on time...and its always good to see the mercy gang
so we walked around...did the ride thing...i went on a scary ride and closed my eyes on it because i cant take that kinda stuff

then as we were leaving....some band was playing the proud to be an american song....which i promptly transformed into GOD BLESS OUR OWN COACH K...oh that was good
had coz collapsed on the ground with laughter
then we threw him in the back of jordans rav 4 and drove to evies

jordan bailed out on us...then we went to kelly's friend's house who was having a kegger
apparently the cops came...but coz and i didnt care because we werent drinking
he was sleeping most of the time anyway
so we just chilled on the couch while everyone scurried about
we were rocking the cherry pepsi.....just like frank the tank
and i was "loud" as usual....with my sportscenter commentary
i love being that way
and i get to keep my keys and remember what happened the night before
kelly was smashed...which was funny
i left the area around 2:30...so i got back up to state around 3:45
oh time flies when youre having fun
good times good times

i really think i should be quagmire for halloween....i can do his laugh perfectly...and i am very hormonally driven sometimes
and i can forget the o in country from time to time
whatever that means
.....

craig monroe is a BAMF

someones gonna find out how huge my mouth is
boo ya

tigers rap coming soon

11:04pm: holy dramalama....kiss her again....do it....
lauren conrad
come on
jason over paris?
im all for moving in with your significant other....but thats a once in a lifetime thing (not to sound clicheish...but i think it really is...unless she scores something next year)
that would be like me turning down japan to move in with britt
i love her...but youve gotta do what you gotta go
yeah id miss everything here....ppl included
but that has to be the fulfillment of a dream of some sort

what a great show
hopefully it will be beck
countdown to laguna......14 days

is it a big deal if i wanna hang out with someone who happened to date someone i currently know?

rain and 70s tomorrow....yayyyy

i really want to try out for jeopardy
ive been getting alot of the college championship questions right
and ive been ok with the regular program
the "hardest" sports questions are ones that anyone who watches an hour of ESPN a week would get right

12:38am: ASK ME ABOUT MY WIENEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRR
for those of you who care.....7 inches

ok anyway....

missing:july
man that month went by fast
for me, it was a blitz of 6-9 hour work shifts
chemistry that makes me happy im not a chem major
physics
the tigers being awesome
delighting in the sufferings of the white sox
and...as of the last couple days.....boy scouts from everywhere and air that is so saturated with moisture i get sweaty palms after sitting down for 1 minute
no girls required

its supposed to be 73 and rainy on thursday
joyfully dancing in the rain, anyone?
cuz thats what im gonna do

really looking forward to operation ira....i mean...dearborn homecoming friday with coz and the mercy crew
that will be vintaaaaggggeeeeee

i move into my real room august 7th
finals aug 14th and 18th
going to florida (ft. meyers and tampa so far)- august 18th-22nd
then aug 23 is freshman move in
/summer

"dude, i hope you dont get shot in the CIA"
thanks coz

the hills has been an amazing show
season finale wednesday
will lauren choose mailubu or paris???
oh i love my dramedies
im a teen dramedy manwhore
and....new laguna beach..august 16th
oh lovely

the worst 4 letter word you can use is......


cant

2:56pm: expecting just a little bit...too much from...the wounded
GGD and counting crows was disappointing
i dont know why counting crows was the lead band when GGD just released a new album and counting crows released theirs last year
and johnny and the boys were only on stage for a about a half hour....and they didnt play alot of stuff they should have
no big machine, no long way down, no dizzy and alot of other songs that arent on the radio but are still really good
bleh
and im not a big fan of counting crows to begin with....but long december and round here were ok
but they didnt even play mr. jones
come on

i want to dress up for halloween this year
lots of possibilities
dr. z- GET IN
the sober frank the tank- the beginning where he's holding the cans of cherry pepsi and yells I DONT KNOW, MIGHT NOT HAVE ENOUGH TIME
brad pitt- i look like him....duh
jim leyland- answering every question with a hushed "oh ok"
we shall see

i finally figured out where the "i shall enjoy watching you die" quote came from...jabba the hut in return of the jedi
i say that whenever the tigers score or the white sox are scored on

some girls have been yelling at me lately...hmmmmm

7:51pm: ching chong....taepedong
i had a good 4th....saw the firecracker mile and the clawson parade
then my dad had a "cookout" on the george foreman grill
then i took a nap and went back up to state

it was so badass that the shuttle launched on july 4th...the first july 4th launch in history
then north korea decided to launch some fireworks of their own...firing a handful of missiles into the sea of japan
some people said it didnt matter....but then they should explain how oil shot up to $75 and all the major indices were down worldwide
i was semi-excited...since this means that we will eventually ally with japan...and i can get a kickass job with the CIA doing recon and analysis work....hopefully either here or japan

i think the beards going to go at the end of the summer

i saw nacho libre on monday....my dad and i both thought it was funny
i really wanna see pirates of the carribean 2 and you me and dupree

one of my best quotes...concerning ozzie guillen....

"come on coz, hes called someone a (homosexual slur) in 2 different languages"

4:28pm: ALL OVER THE PITCH
super fun at home activity:
lay or fall on the ground
grab your shin
scream

congratualtions....you just imitated a world cup soccer player to a t

***to imitate a goalie....randomly jump to the side and flail your arms and legs wildly***

ive been really disappointed with the amount of pissing and moaning in this years world cup
it seems like too many people are falling down too easily and are boo hooing about little love taps
ive seen more aggressive play and less whining at the high school level
im not a fan of cheap shots...but alot of the tackles that have gotten carded have been denounced by the announcers
thats part of the reason futbol isnt anything in the US....its a pussy sport...at least in international play
so....thats my view on it

meyers and i took in the lugnuts game last night
we got to move down a row....so we were 5 rows behind home plate
oldsmobile park is a nice little stadium.....apparently no one told the lugnuts that oldsmobile doesnt make cars anymore....but its only single a ball
did you know that carlos zambrano, corey patterson, and carlos beltran all played for the lugnuts?
betcha didnt
so this team has a history of its players turning out

my right wrist hurts....probably because ive been "emailing" my "cousin" for 5 "hours" in "venezuela"
(aka carlos zambrano)
wink wink

im kind of split over my beard now....because it makes me look a little bit like mark buerhle
i dont want to be giving props to the enemy...so ill just say i look like an amish guy

8:30pm: en fuego funny....
"I'M A BORN AND RAISED NEW YORKER, OK? YOU HAVE GOT TO GET A DOG ON THIS ROSTER, I DON'T CARE WHERE YOU FIND HIM. I DON'T CARE, YOU GOT TO GET SOMEONE WHO WILL BE IN PEOPLE'S FACE, SOMEONE WHO'S HARDCORE. YOU LOOK AT ISIAH THOMAS AND HIS DRAFT HISTORY ... YOU KNOW THAT HE KNOWS TALENT ... THIS PICK HAS GOT TO WORK. IT'S GOT TO WORK!"

The Nets grab a relieved Marcus Williams at No. 22, followed by Stern shaking his hand with one of those "Let's hope this is the last time we cross paths, mister" looks on his face.
During the Williams interview, ESPN chickens out from running a "MUST IMPROVE: KLEPTOMANIA" graphic

...then Utah taking a mortified Ronnie Brewer (who has a "Wait, isn't that the city with no black people?" look on his face)

And what about Portland's wheeling and dealing? They're like a drunk college kid randomly putting together an NBA Live team at 4 a.m (thats for you dan)

10:20 -- The Mavs take Maurice Ager at No. 28. He puts his head in his hands and starts sobbing hysterically as his entourage congratulates him. It's about time we had some emotion tonight, dammit. Ager walks up to the stage in a triple-breasted, oversized beige suit, goes to shake hands with Stern and immediately gets whistled for a foul on Dwyane Wade.


the previous funny tidbits can be found on bill simmons's draft diary X on espn.com
while the first quote is merely the angry black man stephen a smith going on another nrealy breathless rant...the next ones were all simmons
i love that guy
the way he blogs things is hilarious...as well as his articles
so if you want to get a unique perspective on sports and pop culture...read bill simmons
he should be required reading in college
here i am at the library (no laptop remember) and im giggling like a hyena reading this guy
with other people within earshot
him and coz are the only ppl who can make me do that


i really hate the white sox
their announcers have to retire or fall out of the press box or something
i bet ozzie would even call them homophobic slurs if he could hear how annoying they are
they refer to the white sox in the first person way too often
youd think that theyre about to call someone in the dugout to see who wants what on their pizza
too familial
i really hope they lose the division to the tigers on the last day of the season and miss the playoffs completely..because the yankees will win the wild card this year

5:45pm: yeesh....
ive had a trio of bad luck this week

Monday- found out i should get me wisdom teeth pulled
so i get to screw around with my schedule and see when the best day to do it will be...since my second class starts next wednesday
im planning to minimize the damage by getting it done on a friday....so ill only miss one class and have a couple days to recover
then that night i spilled water on my laptop
so hopefully the insurance will get me a new laptop...since its totally fried
then my ipod headphones broke

ok onto the positives...since im a generally optimistic person
the tigers are on fire
making the NL look like a little league...only this little league sucks and doesnt get any post game dairy queen trips
meyers is spending the night tonight, driving out to the grand rapids area to go biking....then hes coming back on friday...were going to the lugnuts game....we got tickets 9 rows behind home plate
and today i watched people play risk and did SNL impersonations at work....and got paid for it

my tiger is kenny rogers
i think ive had more hits than hes given up

11:10pm: oh coz.....the games you play.....
this has been quite the eventful couple of days
i worked 6:45-3:15 on saturday....then I took a nap til 5 and then got up to drive home
construction everywhere.....i swear theres a conspiracy against ppl who live in the tri county area and go to state....it took me 2 1/2 hours (normally it takes under an hour and a half) to get to freaking AMC 30...which is still 10 minutes south of my house....ugh
but the construction ends tomorrow on 696....praise god
so anyway....cheryl bailed on us (no hard feelings) and coz and i saw click....very poignant...i thin adam sandler is developing into a dynamic actor like tom hanks....and yeah i cried
go see it...it has a good moral

then today was the TIGERS GAME with kirk and coz....after going 0 for 7 in asking other ppl to take the last ticket....we were going to take my dad if kirk couldnt go
on the way down there....coz tried to convince us that he saw a school bus driving down the lodge...among other things
made for quite the interesting trip to the d....troit (ask coz why i have to add the last roit part just to be clear on things...)
once we were actually downtown....we had to convince coz that people dont steal cars in broad daylight...and his car is a POS anyway (jk coz...your car rocks)
we parked in a garage that was only 5 bucks and a 10 minute walk to the park....quite the bargain
we missed the polanco bobbleheads:(, but we did get to see another come from behind victory for the best team in baseball
4-1 with a 3 run 8th...st louis used 3 different pitchers that inning...and they all got rocked
brilliant
coz made sure they tigers play the pirates at the end of this month by asking a couple ushers

we managed to convince coz that there was internet in england....since they were the originators of the industrial revolution(kirk) and that chris martin had to have some way of communicating with gwyneth while shes in the states and he's across the pond (me)
i think i had the best explanation

if you can hit the ren cen (about 1000 feet from home plate)....you should get something special
and ask coz about the guy in the suit and the hummer....its hilarious

the drive back had us reminiscing about UD...and then we got into a good discussion about the da vinci code before we dropped kirk off
coz got me back to his place a little after 5 (my car was there)....said hi and bye to his mom....then tried to make it to 5:30 mass...which didnt happen
so i went home, did some laundry....and had dinner with my dad at big boy
then i called emily because i said we would hang out...and we ended up going to (of course) AMC 30 again
she loved my beard
score
we decided to see scary movie 4...which was released in theatres 5 months ago (????)
and it was actually kinda scary
and the previews were scary
ugh
whats with all these scary movies?
we need more lindsay lohan ones

i get to go to the oral surgeon tomorrow and see if my teeth are as screwed up as they feel sometimes...then back up to state for my last week until my 2nd class starts

i want to go to chicago and hold up a sign that says "SHUT UP OZZIE"
ugueth urbina should attack him with a machete and bring his head back here so we can have batting practice with it
those damn sox just tied it against houston with their 3rd grand slam in 3 games.....man the NL sucks
we'll see who has the last laugh in october

go tigers

9:01am: kaboom
me: can you see right now kirk?
kirk: barely

it is totally impossible not to have a fun time at horgans
that kid knows how to host a my parents are not gonna be home for a while so lets party....party
bravo
my beard got a great reception
it serves 2 purposes.....im sad that the pistons are out...but im gearing up for the tigers playoff run
plus it enhances my overall appearance by giving me a rugged, sexy look
and i can stroke it meditatively while im thinking/doing schoolwork

i think the NBA should gather up all the avery johnson and shaq press conferences from this year and put them in a DVD compillation
how funny would that be

the little general:
DWAAAAYYNNNEEE WAAAAAAIIIIIIEEEEEDDDDD
here i am, im supposed to host a prayer meeting
and the "moustache"...classic

shaq daddy:
::random german phrases::
...little earthlings....
he saved me $50....i didnt have to go see my chiropractor

im currently digging the group known as cartel
check them out...download the songs "if i fail", "honestly" and "runaway"

ghanas going down

6:26pm: rough landing holly
saturday and sunday were totally boring and lazy...which was a good thing
i got about 40 hours of sleep in 2 days

but friday was quite the adventure
after work, jamie and i went shopping at the lansing mall
i scored these sweet ass madre shorts, which are pretty much the hottest thing in my wardrobe now, and 2 long sleeve shirts that have about 75 different colors in each of them....all for $22
that was at aero btw
so then we went shoe shopping...since jamie and i both needed shoes
she eventually settled on a pair of adidas...but i couldnt get the new balance shoes i wanted because they only carried standard widths
i might shell out the extra $30 to order them online....theyre the classic 574s and theyre really comfortable
then we concluded the day by going to old navy, where i got some cargo shorts and a polo and she got a shirt or something...who knows
i didnt get to get mt pistons jersey..since dunhams was closed after we got out of old navy...but i ended up not mattering:(
oh well...we still have the shock and tigers to cheer for
then on the way back, jamie remarked that she had seen a billboard for rallys, which she had never been too
of course i was in shock (shes from michigan too), so we went there on the way back from the mall (after turning around once since we passed it)
and now she loves the place...because they have the best fries,and their burgers are huge
it reminded me of when my dad would pick me up from elementary school and we'd go there when the weather was nice and have a junk food picnic
so were leaving rallys...and im trying to get onto eastbound saginaw/69
i definetely turned the wrong way onto a 1 way street
but jamie was cool with it...she just calmly told me that i was facing the wrong way on a one way street so i could smile and pull an emergency u turn to get going the right way
wow
havnt done that since the last time i was in p tac

i think its ironic that the devil rays and the angels played on 6-6-06

im a bad ass motherSHUTYOURMOUTH

GGD and counting crows....july 21...ahhh loveliness

PC load letter...what the fuck does that mean?

with pujols out....who should we be watching barry?

this is m D-O-dizzle...out

5:40pm: forgot to mention....
RIP scooter (britts dog)
we love you

5:12pm: youre so cute when youre slurring your speech
i went an impressive amount of places the past 3 days
saturday after work (and after watching laguna beach for 3 hours at work), i met katie and her roommate and bf in grand rapids to see x men
i thought it was a cool movie, despite falling asleep for about 10 minutes of it
hey i was tired...what can i say
but i woke up in time to see the ending (wow hugh jackman) and the confusing scene after the credits
then i drove home that night and got home about 1 30
sunday i went to church then came back and got dinner with dad at olive garden
he didnt flip out when i told him how expensive a summer in japan was going to be (around 7 grand), so i think he'll be cool with it
then we saw the da vinci code, which was a great movie
i dont care if its true or not, its entertainment
tom hanks is a great actor
then monday i slept in til about 1 and went to big boy with dad (they seriously dont keep any food in our house when the kids are at college...dont ask me why)
and then i came back, packed up my things, and watched made and next with him...since theyre our favorite shows on MTV
made was about a girl from farmington who went to state...and im pretty sure she lived in yakely/gilchrist, judging from the footage
then i left and met my mom at joe kools for more food (yum)
turns out that jenna was hostessing and her family was there...so that was cool
then we watched the first quarter of the pistons game (argh) and i met britt up for ice cream

I'll take sexual tension and confusion for eleventy billion dollars alex
so laguna beachish...i think i really come off as more of a jason person: stupid and untrustworthy
and britts like lauren....really beautiful, the smartest of the bunch, and she deserves
someone a whole hell of alot better than jason
(the hills premiers on wed. at 10/9 central on MTV)
i guess thats why they never dated

anyway....we talked for about an hour or so
and then a bunch of sad songs came on the radio, followed by lets get it on by marvin gaye
hmmmm

i think im starting to like panic! at the disco
partly because their song titles are so humorously long